Here are some pointers. And look inward, McKee adds. After all, cultivating compassion — both self-compassion and compassion for others — is your primary objective. When your colleague shows up late, interrupts you, or is just being all-around obnoxious , you may feel a physiological reaction.
But you must fight against that. Perhaps you and your colleague have children the same age. Maybe your colleague lives in a neighborhood or town that you know intimately. Use those connections to strike up a conversation. When dealing with someone you dislike, you often assume the worst, and that mindset shows up in your behavior. Compliment the person on an idea they raised in a meeting, or offer to help out with a project. And remember, Fernandez says, empathy is a choice you can make in any scenario.
These people come nowhere close to their potential in work or relationships. Those having borderline personality disorder, in particular, suffer from an unstable sense of identity and often lead chaotic, self-destructive lives. Having a PD connotes being inflexible and resistant to change and constructive criticism- even in the face of mounting problems and lack of success.
People with these conditions often have great trouble taking responsibility for their own feelings, behaviors and life outcomes. They can even lash out at those who are genuinely trying to help, including loved ones and mental health professionals. Therefore, they are frequently unwilling to accept assistance or find excuses to drop out of treatment before it has a chance to work.
But when someone offends us, we have a small perspective. This little offense is the biggest thing in the world, and it makes us very angry. We throw the equivalent of a 2-year-old fit. But if we get a bigger perspective "Get Big" , we can see that this little thing matters very little in the bigger picture. So remind yourself to "Get Big," then widen your perspective. When I drive and other drivers do rude things, I often get angry.
Then I remember a trick: I imagine myself floating down a stream in a raft, and the other cars are just twigs and leaves floating past me one way or another on this stream.
And so I serenely float down this stream, not worrying about how the twigs float around me though I try not to hit them, because, you know, safety first. Children feel they are getting unequal amounts of your attention, discipline, and responsiveness. Children may feel their relationship with their parents is threatened by the arrival of a new baby.
Begin typing your search term above and press enter to search. Press ESC to cancel. Skip to content Home Essay What do you do when someone is purposely annoying you? Ben Davis May 1, What do you do when someone is purposely annoying you?
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